James Bond re-visits the Raj; or, Watching “Octopussy” in 2020

I’ve always been a Bond-o-phile.  I don’t know how old I was when I saw my first James Bond film, or which one it was.  The first one I saw in the theaters was A View to a Kill (hey, I was a kid; I didn’t have the best taste!), and I think I’ve seen every one that’s come out since in the theaters too.  I’ve seen every film at least once.  I haven’t read too many of the novels, sticking pretty much to cinematic Bond.  It’s impossible for me to choose a favorite Bond, villain, female interest, theme song, or simply a movie.  But there are a few that I do hold above the rest.  It’s easy to default to Goldfinger: it set the template for the whole series.  Opening scene with nothing to do with the rest of the plot; menacing villain who likes to monologue about a ridiculous scheme; female interest with suggestive name; henchman with a gimmick; Bond one-upping the villain in a game; and of course, Bond drives an Aston-Martin.  So much of what follows throughout the entire series began with Goldfinger.  No wonder it’s considered by many to be the best.

One of the films, made nearly 20 years later, that follows the Goldfinger template fairly closely, is also usually ranked near the bottom of Bond films.  I am referring to 1983’s Octopussy.  Look back at my list of Bond tropes from last paragraph.  While Pussy Galore may have been a character in Goldfinger, she never had a film named after her.  That is not the case with Octopussy (the character herself).   I don’t recall when I first saw Octopussy; I’m sure I didn’t see in the theaters.  I would’ve been 10 years old when it came out.  And I’m also unclear when I went against the grain and started ranking it near the top of my Bond favorites.  I remember my reasonings were, the Indian setting (ever since I first read Around the World in Eighty Days I’ve had a fascination for the Subcontinent…particularly stories of British India); the villain Kamal Khan, and the fact that Octopussy was older than your typical Bond leading lady….therefore making a better match for an again Roger Moore.  As the years went by, I listened to the critiques and agreed with some of them; yes, the plot is hard to grasp.  So the bad guys are smuggling jewels out of the Soviet Union, but there’s also a circus, an island of women, and a nuclear bomb.  Wait….what?  Still, I maintained the general opinion was wrong; Octopussy was solid James Bond film.

It was with that mindset that I watched Octopussy for the first time in probably over a decade, just last night.  I have on DVD all of the Sean Connery and Roger Moore Bond films.  My wife is not as well-versed in all things Bond as I am; I think our first movie date was to see Casino Royale back in 2006.  To catch her up on the past, I’m pretty sure we rented Octopussy at some point; I know she’s seen it, as Kamal Khan’s dinner invitation to Bond, “Please…the soufflé can’t wait” has become part of our vernacular.  Still, assuming that it was 2007 or 2008 when I showed her Octopussy, that’s still 12 or 13 years ago.  Heck, that’s pre-President Obama.  So much has changed since then!  Would I still staunchly defend the case of Octopussy after that long an absence?  Well…let’s do this by category….

  1. Main Villain 

What worked:

I don’t think it’s essential that you have to have a great villain to have a great Bond film.  The Spy Who Loved Me…true, it gave us Jaws, but he was a henchman. True baddie Stromberg is pretty forgettable.  Menacing, but his scheme was ridiculous (cause World War III and start over under the seas).  And there have been really good villains saddled with bad films; Christopher Walken as Max Zorin in A View to a Kill; Christopher Lee in The Man with the Golden Gun; and most recently, Christoph Walz in Spectre.  Generally, the best Bond films have really memorable villains: Auric Goldfinger, Raoul Silva in Skyfall, and of course, Alec Trevelyan in Goldeneye.  And for me, one of the reasons I love Octopussy is the villain, Kamal Khan, as played by Louis Jourdan.

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I love this picture.  To me, it sums up everything about Kamal Khan.  Elegant, debonair, controlled, confident, smug.  Kamal’s backstory is pretty much summed up in two different scenes.  At Sotheby’s, the art expert tells Bond he’s typically a seller, not a buyer.  And then when Bond arrives in India, Vijay informs Bond that Kamal is an exiled Afghan prince and a sportsman.  That’s about all we get on Kamal.  And if your complaint is, why is a French actor playing a character who is Afghan…..well, point taken.  But Jourdan plays the character so well!  Pretty much until the Pierce Brosnan films, the Bond villains were not played by the most notable actors (Christoper Lee of course, being an exception).  How familiar are you with the work of Curt Jurgens (The Spy Who Loved Me), Charles Gray (Diamonds are Forever), or Michael Lonsdale (Moonraker)?  That changes in the Brosnan era, when you get actors such as Sean Bean, Sophie Marceau, Robert Carlyle, Jonathan Pryce, and Rosamund Pike all working against 007.  But with Octopussy, we get Louis Jourdan, who already had enjoyed a long career in movies, most notably the 1959 MGM musical Gigi.

Kamal Khan is a different kind of Bond villain.  He’s not a megalomaniac; world conquest is not his goal.  He doesn’t employ a massive, uniformed private army like so many Bond super villains.  His Palace is guarded by local security.  His right hand man is a towering Sikh, Gobinda (more soon to follow).  From what we see, Kamal is fabulously wealthy, lives a life of leisure, and his racket is jewel-smuggling.  He doesn’t have any grand scheme; it’s Soviet general Orlov who has the master plan.  Kamal merely helps him out by providing the connection to Octopussy’s Circus.  Oh, and he has his own team making counterfeit Russian jewelry in his palace.  Kamal really just seems to be in it for money.  Not power, not sex, not control….just to make money.  Heck, when he’s abandoning his Palace near the end of the film, he reveals he has plates to start printing currency.  Quite resourceful!

Some would say this makes Kamal Khan a boring villain.  Anything but!  In my opinion, he is the most smooth, urbane, well-polished villain in the entire canon.  He rarely raises his voice, he is great with a quip, and he just looks SOOO good.  Here’s a short compilation of Kamal speaking.  And while you dwell on that luxurious voice, look at the suits he wears!  A tux, a business suit, two different Nehru collars, an open collar with blazer, and even something appropriate for a safari.  There are other villains who treat Bond to dinner, but I’m not aware of one who so seems at ease as an aristocrat as Kamal Khan.  Then again, he is an exiled Prince; did Bond ever encounter other royalty?

I’ve got much more to talk about than just Kamal Khan, but let me give you a few more reasons why he stands out to me.  For starters, he never monologues to Bond.  The only scene where that might have happened is the dinner, but that’s halfway through the film.  All Kamal does is talk about how Bond will be made to talk.  Maybe it’s because Kamal is not the creator of the scheme, but only an enabler.  Whatever the reason, he doesn’t get the chance to reveal it to Bond.  He also never comes up with outlandish ways to kill Bond.  He sends his henchman Gobinda after him, he hires mercenaries, he leaves Bond to be destroyed in a nuclear blast.  There’s no strapped down to a table with a laser, or fed to sharks.  The only thing that comes close is a hunting party….but it makes for a great action sequence.  It is interesting to me that Kamal Khan is in almost the entire film.  Many Bond villains are seen intermittently.  Often, such as with Blofeld in You Only Live Twice, Bond doesn’t encounter them till in the film’s second half.  That’s not the case with Kamal.  Bond first runs into him in the auction, and then continues to cross his path.  My guess is director John Glen realized what he had with Louis Jourdan, and made milked it for all he was worth!

The last thing I’ll mention about Kamal that I find interesting is….is he gay?  When we first encounter him at Sotheby’s, he has the beautiful Magda with him.  Later, she is at his side when he’s playing backgammon, and she even appears to live in his Palace.  Yet Kamal seems uninterested when Magda sleeps with Bond to get the Faberge egg back.  When he goes to visit Octopussy, on her island of only women, Kamal finds everything mundane.  Lastly, near the end, when Kamal is preparing his exit, Gobinda tells him the noise is “women, selling themselves.”  There’s a bit of detest in his voice and a slight rolling of the eyes.  Are we to believe there is something between Gobinda and Kamal?  As fashionable as Kamal, it wouldn’t be too far-fetched to see him as gay.   Just for speculation.

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What doesn’t work:

For starters, as wonderful as Louis Jourdan is in the role, Kamal Khan is Afghani.  There’s a long history of this in movies.  Sir Alec Guniness playing King Faisal in Lawrence of Arabia or Yul Brynner playing the King of Siam in The King and I.  This may not have been perceived as a problem in 1983, but watching in 2020, it does bother me.  If Octopussy was made today, I would hope an Afghani actor would play Kamal.

Related to that, there are a couple moments when the script went too far with Kamal.  Dinner at 8 in very formal attire…..perfectly fitting for the character.  Eating stuffed sheep’s head and munching on the eyeball….why?  Maybe it’s truly a delicacy.  It just seemed…well, why give this man, who is the definition of sophistication such a touch?  And then, before the hunt begins, Bond hides in a room in the Palace that has dead humans in it.  Again….why?  Why does Kamal Khan keep dead people?  Perhaps they found out something about him that they weren’t supposed to?  Perhaps it’s to tell the viewers that despite how smooth he is, Kamal is a bad dude.  That could be.  For me though, I don’t think we need to see a savage side to Kamal.  Let him stand on his own as the most gentlemanly of any Bond antagonist.

2. Other Villains

Joining Kamal as the baddy in Octopussy is Soviet General Orlov.  He’s the one with the scheme, and it’s actually a pretty darn good one.  It’s kind of what makes Octopussy work for me.  The Roger Moore films had some pretty over-the-top story lines; rich shipping magnate wants to end life on Earth so everyone can live under the sea (The Spy Who Loved Me); weird guy with droll inflection wants to wipe out life on Earth from space and then breed a master race (Moonraker).  After that, things calmed down with For Your Eyes Only; a real spy story where an underworld crime lord tries to sell a decoder to Soviets.  Everything was realistic, anchored in the Cold War; nothing outlandish.   Octopussy stays with the Cold War, and even though it’s a little more fanciful, it actually makes sense: Orlov wants to detonate a nuclear bomb on a U.S. base in West Germany.  It will be assumed this was an American error, and West Germany will insist on nuclear disarmament.  The Red Army would then be unopposed.  It actually seems like something that could happen.  Now Orlov himself is fine.  Steven Berkoff plays him with the right amount of malevolence.  He snarls, he loses his temper….basically everything a glory-seeking Red Army general would be, as depicted by a Western movie during the Cold War.  Its a stereotype, but it works.  It will always seem a secondary villain to me, like there are in many a Bond film.  Berkoff just isn’t the actor Louis Jourdan was.  I think John Glen felt the same; Orlov meets his demise long before Kamal does.

More interesting, though, is the aforementioned Gobinda.  I actually think he is one of the very best henchmen in the entire James Bond canon. octopussy_s_04_500

You see, Gobinda doesn’t have a gimmick. He doesn’t have metal teeth, he’s not mute (he doesn’t talk much….but he does talk), and he doesn’t have an unusual weapon.  No throwing his hat, here!  His method of intimidation are crushing dice into power….which seems believable by a man as big as him.  Gobinda’s weapons vary from a blunderbuss (okay, that’s a bit weird) to a sword, to a knife, to a rifle.  And he doesn’t have to do it all himself.   When Kamal’s previous attempts to be rid of Bond doesn’t work, he and Gobinda hire mercenaries to attack Octopussy’s island.

I never found Gobinda to be cartoonish; I actually found him menacing.  And Bond really isn’t able to ever beat him.  He finally dispatches him by releasing an antenna on his face, when both are clinging to the top of Kamal’s plane.  Perhaps that’s why Gobinda typically isn’t mentioned on the list of great Bond henchmen; there’s no gimmick.  He’s not a cartoon.  He’s just a really tough, intimidating big man who is more than enough for James Bond to handle.

3.  Bond Women

What Worked:

Octopussy for a Bond film has a relatively low women count.  I know that sounds insane for a film in which there is an island inhabited completely by beautiful women.  But if you go by what women Bond actually has relations with, there are only two.  I guess you can go three if you go with his ally in the pre-credit sequence.  Here’s the thing: none of the women are disposable.  They all play a part in the narrative, none of them meet a tragic end (as often happens when there are multiple Bond girls), and each of them can function on their own, without needing Bond….for the most part.  Yes, Octopussy requires Bond to save her at the end….but we’ll get to that.  And heck, you could say that’s balanced out by the woman in the pre-credit sequence in some Latin American country (I always assumed Cuba but the fact that Bond flies over a crossing area into a different nation makes me wonder); she not only gives Bond his disguise to get into the airplane hangar, she’s the one who rescues him when he’s captured.  So, if Bond does indeed have to save Octopussy at the end, let’s consider it an even trade for he being bailed out by his female companion at the beginning!

Alright, let’s look at the two female leads, starting with Octopussy herself.

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So before revisiting Octopussy, I thought the titular character was a great leading lady for James Bond.  The actress Maud Adams was older (at least not in her 20s), and that worked with a Roger Moore who was then in his 50s.  What I didn’t realize till my recent rewatching is….Adams was still 17 years younger than Moore.  I guess that was wishful thinking on my part.  Still, it’s better than a 25 or 30 year age gap.

But there’s more to appreciate about Octopussy than her being somewhat older than a typical Bond girl.  One is her backstory.   Is there a more fantastic storyline in the Bond canon?  She’s the daughter of a rogue agent Bond exposed decades ago.  She respects Bond because he gave her father the option of suicide, rather than public disgrace.  Sort an honor amongst thieves, I suppose.  Octopussy assumed command of her father’s operation and boy, did she run with it!  It’s explained very briefly, but from what we she tells Bond, she revived the cult of the Octopus and took in young women who are roaming around Asia, looking to find themselves.  Octopussy gives them a purpose: in addition to running a jewel-smuggling ring, she also operates a circus.   All the time, the beautiful women reside on her floating island, row her galley, and serve as her security force.  They’re all gorgeous and powerful; her army pretty much takes out Kamal’s security detail, with only minimal help from James Bond.  It’s a story that really deserved much more fleshing out.  Just as Daniel Craig’s Bond recently encountered Blofeld, perhaps a future Bond can reimagine Octopussy, and how she created her own kingdom?  Who wouldn’t want to see Octopussy recruiting her forces and her training program?

So this is what works about Octopussy: closer in age to Bond than the typical Bond girl, her backstory is tremendous, and she (and her forces) really can stand on their own.  Though Kamal does work behind her back, to her face, he is very deferential (and soooo smooth.  Just listen to anytime he says her name; so silky!). When Kamal hires mercenaries to take out Bond, they warn him they “don’t want any trouble with The Woman.”  Octopussy is powerful and respected.  And though Bond does have to rescue her, it’s not like so many scenarios, where the Bond girl is helpless and he has to do everything.  Octopussy’s forces have infiltrated the Monsoon Palace, and she has Kamal at gunpoint.  Kamal being Kamal, he is almost able to talk his way out of it, and then he and Gobinda overpower her.  Yes, Bond has to save the day….but hey, it’s a Bond film.  What did you really expect?  And again, he only saves Octopussy after her own women have pretty much laid out all of Kamal’s goons.  Here’s the scene.   Also pay attention to the shot at 4:07 in the clip.  I’ve always been impressed by the camerawork there: Octopussy fighting the goons, and Kamal walking into the shot, with the camera rising.  You’re seeing it from the perspective of Bond and Q in the balloon.  Director John Glen had worked on as second unit director on previous Bond films, and shots like that show he knew how to frame something.

The other Bond woman (not counting the one in the pre-credit scene) is Magda.

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She’s the first one Bond encounters, as she is seen at Kamal’s side at the auction.  Magda is more your typical Bond girl in that she’s young and beautiful.  But there’s more to her than that.  The relationship with Kamal is left unclear.  You might first assume she’s his mistress, but as we see, Kamal seems to take no notice of women.  In addition to being with him at the auction, she’s at his side when he plays backgammon, and later, not only is a guest at dinner but appears to be living at the Monsoon Palace.  She seduces Bond, in order to retrieve a Faberge egg.   And again, Kamal seems to have no problem with Magda being with Bond.  But then in the film’s second half, Magda appears to be working with Octopussy.  She is a costumed performed in the circus, and when Bond (as a clown) pleads that a nuclear bomb will go off, she warns Octopussy that he’ll ruin the whole operation.  We must assume that by “operation”, Magda is only referring to jewel smuggling.  Though she is tied to Kamal, the fact that she’s in the circus with the ticking bomb would have us believe she’s not in on the real plan.  Heck, maybe she really was Kamal’s lover, and he leaving her in the dark about the plan is his way of getting back at her for sleeping with Bond.  Or maybe I’m thinking too much into this.

As the secondary Bond girl, Magda doesn’t need to be well-drawn out.  But she’s definitely different than the typical Bond second girl.  For starters…she doesn’t die, a fate pretty common with secondary Bond girls.  Secondly, she’s a tough one.  Her seducing of Bond to get the egg is followed by her dive from a balcony, using her gown as a rope.  And then in the attack on the Monsoon Palace, we see her laying waste to Kamal’s goons.  And at the point, there’s no doubt why she’s in league with Octopussy; Kamal left her to be blown up!   There’s a moment when Bond in disguise is sneaking around the circus train in East Germany.  Magda clearly spots him…but never says anything.  Why?  Much like all of Octopussy’s plots, this is just one more aspect that you just go “huh”?  Just roll with it and enjoy the film.

Who would’ve thought, a film named Octopussy would actually have some of the most confident, self-reliant, not-in-need of help resourceful women in the entire Bond series?  Octopussy, Magda, the woman in the pre-credit scene, and all of Octopussy’s underlings; Bond may save the title character at the end, but overall, this is a movie where the women can stand on their own!

What didn’t work:

Maybe its because Octopussy doesn’t appear till about halfway through the film, I always feel like her character is underdeveloped.  It’s more than just the backstory.  She welcomes Bond because he gave her father a choice, she tells Kamal not to kill him.  She then offers Bond an opportunity to work with her.  He refuses, she gets all mad and has a tirade over loyalty to Queen and Country, he grabs her, kisses her….and that’s it.  From that point on, Octopussy is now a pawn in Kamal and Orlov’s plot, and then later Kamal’s prisoner in need of rescue.  All that I wrote about before, her backstory, her power….it all sort of goes away when Bond kisses her.

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Look, I get it.  I know that’s the Bond playbook.  The Bond kiss conquers all.  I get it, this is a Bond film made in 1983; we can only expect so much.  But still…..we got such a great backstory on Octopussy; you’d think someone who has built up a crime empire, developed her own business, and has a horde of women all serving her (they literally row a yacht for her!) would be tougher to conquer.   Or if indeed she is a romantic foil for Bond, let it be on her terms.  It just seemed too easy for someone who has done so much, to have all that power and uniqueness melt down for 007.  It also doesn’t help that Maud Adams just isn’t a great actress.  I couldn’t find the love scene on Youtube; the only version I could find was in Spanish so that’s not going to help.  The point is, with a better actress, you might have been able to have more dramatic effect with Octopussy yelling at Bond that she has no country to be loyal to.   Perhaps that was it; with Maud Adams, there was just going to be a limitation in really dramatically developing Octopussy.  Give the backstory and move on.  Still….if ever there was a Bond woman who you wish had more than one film, it’d be Octopussy for me.  I’d love to see more about her operation; you’d have to think 007 would encounter it again sometime.

The other thing that could’ve worked better with the women of Octopussy would’ve been if they hadn’t been all white.  It’s the same thing with Louis Jourdan playing an Afghani character.  Actually…no it’s not.  Jourdan was a French actor playing an Afghani character.  With Octopussy and her proteges, and also Magda at times, you get white women playing at Indian.  They are often dressed in Indian attire…but they’re clearly white.  It’s what you’d call cultural appropriation.  Jourdan is a white actor playing an ethnic role.  But Octopussy is a white character that is trying to act like a cross between a guru and a maharajah.  If you made Octopussy today, you could still have the backstory, you could still have her mentor young white women searching for themselves…but what if Octopussy actually was Indian?  And then, of course, make her more resistant to James Bond’s kiss.  I know, I’m talking of a movie made in 1983.  But if you made a new Octopusssy, that would be an improvement.

4. Bond’s allies

What worked

james bond octopussy retrospective 1983 roger moore vijay amritraj desmond llewellyn mark west strange tales pinewoodIn the Sean Connery James Bonds, 007 is often assisted by CIA counterpart Felix Leiter.  The majority of Connery films take place in the United States (Goldfinger, Diamonds are Forever) or nearby (Dr. No, Thunderball) so Leiter’s presence makes sense.  With Roger Moore, the action is much more worldwide, and so Leiter only appears in the first installment,  Live and Let Die.  Moore’s 007 had a bevy of different allies, and Octopussy gave us one of the very best.

I’m talking about Vijay, played by Indian tennis pro Vijay Armritraj.  Vijay is one of the most likable characters in the entire Bond canon.  His introduction is also one of the most memorable.  As Bond arrives in India, a snake charmer catches his attention by playing the James Bond Theme.  Talk about a self-aware Bond!  Vijay proves quickly to not be an Indian stereotype; he laughs with Bond about his disguise and how he hates snakes.  Vijay drives Bond through a memorable car chase on a Tuk Tuk and delivers him to Q.  His response to anything Bond says is “No problem.”  Like many Bond allies, Vijay does not make through the film.  Thankfully we don’t see it, but it’s implied he’s killed by the thug with the yo-yo saw blade (talk about a ghastly death).  It’s clear to me that director John Glen knew how well-received Vijay would be.  When Bond discovers his death, composer John Barry’s score takes a distinctly melancholy turn.  And in the following scene, when Bond is being chauffeured into East Germany, his driver comments “No problem,” to which Bond winces.  Throughout the cannon, Bond has seen plenty of good men die.  Most often, the character is forgotten by the next scene.  To see Bond grimace when another character uses Vijay’s catchphrase was something different. It’s one thing for a Bond ally to meet a gruesome demise; it’s commonplace in the series.  But to have take such an emotional toll….that was different in Octopussy, a tribute to how good a character Vijay was.

The other major ally in Octopussy is none other than Q.  Octopussy is the film that breaks with the usual Q routine.  Sure, we get the visit to Q’s laboratory, with the insane weapons of silly destruction, and Bond’s childish antics.  And Octopussy, I must say, takes the cake for Bond immaturity.  Just after I got done talking about how much power the women of Octopussy have, this is the film where, in Q’s lab, Bond zooms a camera’s focus on a woman’s cleavage.  You can look the scene up yourself.  But where Q differs in this film is that he plays a role beyond the one gadget scene.  We get Q and Vijay on stake-out duty, while Bond is on Octopussy’s island; it’s Q who is the one who finds Vijay dying.  And of course, we get the scene of Q and Bond in a Union Jack hot air balloon. coming to the rescue at the Monsoon Palace.  As I already mentioned, Octopussy’s forces pretty hold their own.  But when one goon them at gunpoint, it’s Q in a balloon that saves the day.  And who doesn’t like the the old, flustered Q, grumbling as the women fawn all over him?  Call it Q’s finest hour in the whole Bond cannon!

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What didn’t work?

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.  What a perfect trio of allies: the woman who helps Bond in the pre-credit scene (and rescues him, rather than the typical other way around); the very likable Vijay (did ever a Bond ally’s death have such an impact?); and Q getting to do more than just provide gadgets.  And I might add, the gadgets Q does supply are so low-key: a fountain pen that allows Bond to escape from his room in the Monsoon Palace; a watch connected to a video camera; and a hidden microphone in a Faberge egg.  That’s it.    Of course in a film where the villains are shot in the back (Orlov) or killed in a plane crash (Kamal), you really don’t need over-the-top gadgetry.  Anyway, nothing needs improving for Bond’s allies in Octopussy; they’re all perfect.

5.  The Setting

What Worked:

Bond films have been known for their exotic settings.  The Man with the Golden Gun took us to Thailand and Hong Kong.  The Spy Who Loved Me included Egypt and Sardinia.  One place Bond had not been was India.  George MacDonald Fraser, author of the Flashman novels, worked on the story for Octopussy and was the one who brought up India as the setting.  And maybe that’s why I’ve always loved Octopussy; I’ve always been fascinated by India.  And my, does Octopussy give us so much of it.  We have a crowded city bazaar, we’ve got Tuk Tuks, we have sword swallowers and fire breathers.  We’ve got Octopussy’s beautiful floating palace, and the glamour of the hotel Bond stays at.  And it’s all filmed on location, in Udaipur and it looks gorgeous.  For someone who is fascinated by India, Octopussy makes me want to go there.

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The real floating palace of Octopussy

But only half of Octopussy takes place in India.  The bomb sequence gives us East Germany.  Just after the credits, we see 009 trying to escape with a counterfeit egg to the British Embassy in East Berlin.  Bond is dropped off at Checkpoint Charlie.  We see the circus train searched at the border as it crosses from East Germany to the West.  Though pretty much every Bond film pre-Pierce Brosnan takes place in the Cold War, never was it depicted at the forefront.  Many a Bond film featured a plot device of goading the US and the Soviet Union into nuclear war….but the action took place in some far-off locale.  From Russia with Love occurs in Turkey and aboard the Orient Express.  The Spy Who Loved Me has Bond working with KGB agent Amasova, but the setting never goes behind the Iron Curtain.  Octopussy, unless I am forgetting something, was the only Bond film where the action is in the Eastern Bloc.  And it’s also one of the few that has a Russian as a villain.  True, General Orlov is acting on his own, to detonate a nuclear bomb on a US Air Force Base.  But his rationale is to create an opportunity for Soviet conquest of Western Europe.  It’s not SPECTRE or someone else trying to bring the Soviets and the US into combat; it’s a Red Army general who is the enemy.  Octopussy stands alone in the Bond canon for not just happening during the Cold War but really depicting the Cold War.

What didn’t work:

Though I loved seeing India in Octopussy in my recent reviewing, there’s much of the depiction that just hasn’t aged well.

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The Tuk Tuk street chase is terrific.  But once Bond is on foot, it becomes one stereotype after another.  Mystic who lies on a bed of nails: check.  Guy who breathes fire:  check.  Guy who swallows swords: check.  And it doesn’t stop at the scene.  We know what a gentleman Kamal Khan is; is the only reason he’s munching on a sheep’s eyeball because he’s Afghani and that seems like something an Afghani prince would do?    I understand situating the film in its locale; India in 1983 is exotic, so why not show it off?  But Octopussy, at least in the street fight scene, goes from local color to expected trope way too quickly.

But to me the bigger problem with Octopussy’s India is that it’s white people playing India.  While it takes place in 1983, at times it feels like the British Raj all over again.  Here’s the backgammon game, before Bond joins it:

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The players are two white people (okay, Kamal is SUPPOSED to be Afghani), while all the Indians are standing around.  Heck, Kamal’s opponent is a British Major!  This is 1983; why would a British Major be playing backgammon in a casino in India.  This isn’t 1883!  Think of who Bond interacts with India.  Yes, Vijay is Indian.  So is Gobinda, Kamal’s right hand man.  But Octopussy and Magda are not.  But they still dress as if they are.  That, more than the stereotypes, is what seems to have aged the worst about Octopussy.  Yes, it’s cringe-worthy when Bond hands cash to an Indian British agent and tells him, “That ought to keep you in the curry for a while.”  But it’s far more bothersome the idea of all the white people playing Indian.  Again, it’s different than a French actor playing an Afghani actor.  And I acknowledge that’s problematic (while I still LOVE Jourdan’s portrayal of Kamal).  But Octopussy and her troupe are assuming the lifestyle of Indian royalty and their court, but are clearly white characters.  They’re not white actors playing Indian character; instead, they’re white characters wanting to live like Indians.  Cultural appropriation at its finest…err, most unsettling.  Octopussy could have worked just as well, if the title character and her brood were actual Indians.

6.  The Action

What Works:

Director John Glen having previously been a secondary unit director was obviously good training for being the head man, for Octopussy has some of the best action sequences in any Bond film.  There’s not one that seems excessive, all are paced well,  Directors of modern action flicks could take a lesson here, instead of having the a ction goes on and on.  And on.  With Octopussy, the perfect balance is taken between plot and then action….and almost all the action comes out of that plot.  Take this pattern:  Bond arrives in India, beats Kamal Khan in backgammon.  Alright, time for action: cue the tuk-tuk chase/street fight.  Later on, Bond is on Octopussy’s island and they have their intimate moment.  This is immediately followed by the attack from the thugs Kamal hired.  And I have to say, the thug with the saw blade on a yo-yo was genuinely terrifying.  And in two cases, as soon as Bond begins to unravel the villain’s scheme, we go right to action.  No sooner has General Orlov’s helicopter flown away from Kamal’s palace but are we treated to human hunt scene, where Kamal and Gobinda on elephants are in pursuit of Bond.  As Kamal proclaims, “Let the sport commence!”  The second comes when Bond captures Orlov and he reveals what his nuclear ambition is.  Orlov soon escapes, and what follows is really, pretty much non-stop action (with a few breaks) to the end.  Bond trying to catch up to Octopussy’s circus train in Orlov’s car, even riding on the train rails; Bond battling Kamal and his henchmen on the train; and Bond doing whatever it takes to stop the bomb before it goes off (clown suit, anyone?).  From the moment we see the bomb placed on the train, the dramatic tension only keeps building.  And after a brief respite (like possibly 2 minutes), we’re back in India for the conclusion, with Octopussy’s forces raiding Kamal’s palace, Kamal taking her captive, and Bond coming to the rescue.

Because it’s Bond, and especially because the Bond is Roger Moore, a lot of the action is over the top.  The human hunt in the Indian jungle, for example.  Perhaps the most hard to believe is Bond holding onto to the exterior of Kamal’s plane.

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It’s outrageous…but I guess after the ridiculousness of Bond in Space just two movies earlier, this doesn’t really bother me.  However it was filmed, it looked very convincing.  And composer John Barry (more on him soon), like Bernard Herrmann with North by Northwest and its crop duster attack, knew that sometimes with aerial combat, its more impressive if the plane engine is the soundtrack.  Here’s the second half of the scene; this is preceded by a part where Kamal does all kinds of aerial acrobatics to dislodge Bond.  I know its ridiculous but it’s the final combat of the film…you have to pull out all the stops, don’t you?

I also have to mention that pre-credit scene.  It has absolutely nothing to do with the plot of the film; it’s just an 8 minute action stand-alone.  And it ABSOLUTELY works.  What’s striking about it is, Bond seemingly fails on his mission there.  He plants a bomb to blow up some experimental aircraft in this Latin America country (Cuba?), but his cover is blown.  His female accomplice bails him out, he then uses a secret miniature jet of his own, and still achieves his goal.  It’s a great scene; a bit over the top, but completely fun and sets the tone for the film.  It’s John Glen’s way of saying, buckle up friends, we’re going to have some fun tonight!

What doesn’t work:

There’s a bad tendency in Roger Moore films to put unnecessary slapstick/visual/aural gags into the action.  The Man with the Golden Gun has one of the best automobile stunts in all of James Bond…and its accompanied by a slide whistle.  Moonraker has a pigeon doing a double take when Bond drives a gondola out of the Venice canals and into St. Mark’s Square.  Octopussy is not free from these sins.  Bond swinging on a jungle vine during the hunt?  Sure, I can buy it.  But do we need a Tarzan yell while doing so?  And like that Venetian pigeon, Vijay beating a goon with a tennis racket and those watching turning their hands back and forth, as if watching a tennis match.  Yes, we get it…Vijay is a tennis pro….but could we do without the gag?  In both cases, it just takes away from what was a really good action sequence.

By now, you’ve probably got the impression that I really like Kamal Khan.  Louis Jourdan nailed the role.  The Bond films have so many crazy, threatening, snarling over the top villains.  Octopussy has that with Orlov.  But there’s a reason Kamal lasts till near the very end.  His suave, elegant nature improves every scene he’s in.  I can’t disagree more with people who consider him an unmemorable villain.  Sure, if you like your villain a megalomaniac with a world destruction plot, Kamal’s not for you.  Or if you want your villain to be physically threatening to Bond like Scaramanga or Largo, that’s not Kamal either.  But if you want a villain who doesn’t want world conquest but rather, just riches, is smooth as silk, as is just a suave operator, that’s Kamal Khan.

The reason I bring this up here is….I feel like Kamal’s death is sort of tacked on.  Bond and Octopussy get out of the plane and then it proceeds to crash.  Bond never personally killed Kamal, like he did Stromberg, Kananga, Scaramanga or Drax; he damaged his plane and Kamal never regained control.  In fact, Kamal and Bond never really have a one-on-one confrontation outside of backgammon.  So why do I bring this up?

Well, let me explain.  The Roger Moore films never had a reoccurring villain like Blofeld (I’m not counting Jaws, as he was a henchman not a head honcho, and he’s pretty much comic relief by Moonraker); due to legal questions regarding ownership, Blofeld and SPECTRE are out of sight in the Moore era.  For Your Eyes Only begins with Bond dumping a bald man with a Persian cat down a factory smokestack….but the name Blofeld is never given.  It’s the producers’ way of saying F YOU over the legalities of Blofeld.

So how does this relate to Kamal?  In a typical Bond film, the villain’s master plan is foiled and now it’s Bond just cleaning up.  That’s when Goldfinger goes down.  Stromberg too.  What was really going to happen to them?  Their master plan is over with; how do you come back from that?  But with Kamal, it’s different.  It was Orlov who wanted the nuclear explosion; Kamal just wanted the reward.   After that, he’s clearing out, with plans to go into counterfeiting.  How easy would it have been for Kamal to regain control of his plane, and as Bond and Octopussy pull themselves to safety, see it fly off into the distance.  Perhaps Kamal smiles and salutes, “To next time, Mr. Bond!”  And there’s your answer to Blofeld.  Kamal flies off to somewhere else obscure on Earth and begins a new criminal enterprise.  He’s kind of like Prof. Moriarty in Sherlock Holmes.  It’s Orlov who wants war, Kamal has the criminal operation to help him make that happen….for a handsome price.  I know Octopussy was possibly going to be the final Roger Moore film….and probably should’ve been, the way A View to a Kill turned out!  So there really wasn’t the need to introduce an archvillian who spanned multiple films at that point.  Too bad.  What if Octopussy had happened earlier in the Moore tenure?  Kamal wouldn’t have had to be a Blofeld-type out for constant world domination, but perhaps the head of an underground network who’s path Bond kept running into.  I think it could’ve had potential!

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Kamal, you deserved better!

Only two more categories to go.  Hey, Octopussy is over two hours long; this has to take a while!

9.  The Music

I’m going to go the opposite of what I’ve been doing and go first with..

What Didn’t Work

That song.  It has some nice moments to it, especially some very tasty guitar work during the “hold tight, let the fight begin” part.  But man…All Time High is SOOOO dated.  That light rock (or soft core porn, if you prefer) saxophone solo.  Here’s the opening credits.  The way that saxophone just rips in, it so perfectly DESTROYS all the fun from that pre-credit scene!  Look, I get it; composer John Barry was trying to match what Marvin Hamlisch did with Nobody Does It Better from The Spy Who Loved Me.  It’s just….not as good.  Rita Coolidge is not Carly Simon.  And Nobody Does It Better was a great song of the 1970s.  But Octopussy is 1983 and All Time High is not hip.  It’s soft rock.  It’s not a forgettable tune, it’s not a bad one….it just seems tired and out of place.

What Did Work

EVERYTHING ELSE MUSICALLY.  Literally….EVERYTHING ELSE.  John Barry did not score all of the James Bond films but he’s pretty much the guy who made the Bond sound.  A court case upheld Monty Norman as the composer of the Bond theme…but it’s pretty much agreed that it was John Barry who arranged it to the form we know and love.  But if there’s any doubt that John Barry didn’t create the Bond sound, I got one word for you: GOLDFINGER.  Admit it, you heard Shirley Bassey’s voice when you read that, didn’t you?  That was John Freaking Barry.  And it’s not just Goldfinger.  How about those wonderful cascading strings to start You Only Live Twice?  Or Bassey again, with Diamonds are Forever?  All John Barry.

I’ve long believed John Barry is right there near John Williams in terms of film composer greatness.  And there really isn’t anyone ever in Hollywood history who could write the HUGE, sweeping theme as JB.  Here’s one that won him an Oscar.  That theme.  Barry had done that his whole career.  From Born Free to Dances with Wolves.. And Octopussy is no different.  Remember when I said how soft rock an All-Time High sounded?  I stand by that.  But when John Barry uses it as the background for the love scenes, it’s positively GORGEOUS.  Man, I don’t know if another composer in movie history could write so well for strings.  Take a listen at 3:10 mark.  Isn’t that just beautiful?!

Two things stand out for me about John Barry’s work on Octopussy, which I really think is some of the best work of his entire career. In Out of Africa, Director Sydney Pollack wanted native African music.  Barry successfully fought against that because he said the movie was about the relationship between Karen Blixen and Denys Fitch-Hatton, neither of whom were African.  He does the same with Octopussy.  I’ve already talked about how, while the major characters are in India, none of them are actually natives.  Barry picks up on that.  He gives us music that is exotic, with a touch of danger to it….but it never claims to be Indian.  It’s full Western symphonic music.  Whether you want to add that to the complaints of Octopussy being white people playing at India…well that’s up to you.  Take a listen to the music for the scene of Kamal arriving at the Island of Octopussy.  There’s mystery to it, it’s exotic, there’s a touch of danger.  To meJohn Barry completely captures the mood.  It doesn’t try to be imitative of India, it’s just….exotic.  I love it.

The other thing about Barry’s score to Octopussy is how he calls up the James Bond theme to kick some of the action scenes into higher gear.  That’s not coincidental.  Octopussy had to contend with competition at the box office from Never Say Never Again, the non-Eon James Bond film.  It had the rights to Blofeld, SPECTRE and basically the plot of Thunderball.. But it didn’t have the right to the music or the trademark Gun Barrel opening.  So with that being the case, Barry used that familiar theme to remind everyone that this was the REAL Bond.  Watch this scene from where Bond is escaping from the Russians, to chase Octopussy’s circus train.  The first couple minutes are silent.  John Barry typically doesn’t use music to accompany action, it’s more to set the mood.  But once the train is on the tracks, we immediately get the Bond theme.  The timing is PERFECT.  Barry had been with the franchise since Dr. No; he knew what he was doing.  No he didn’t write that song, but when composing for James Bond, nobody did it better.

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John Barry at his piano in 1967, the year You Only Live Twice — the fifth of the 11 James Bond films he scored — was released in theaters.

10.  James Bond himself.  

I saved this one for last because this is probably the biggest bone of contention Bond fans have with Octopussy.  You mean, the one where Bond is a clown?  It’s unforgivable!

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Or is it?  Let’s go first with

What Didn’t Work

This is really a commentary on the entire Roger Moore Bond era but there’s always an upping the ante in terms of the slapstick.  Starting with his first film, Live and Let Die, the preposterous gets hyped up.  The villain in Live and Let Die literally inflates and pops.  Don’t believe me?  The plots, as I’ve mentioned before, get crazier throughout the Moore tenure, till For Your Eyes Only grounds everything.  Octopussy looked like it was going to be the final Moore film, and we see someone who is very at ease playing 007.  Maybe just a little too at ease.

Here’s Bond at the end of the pre-credit scene, landing his mini-jet at a service station.  Look at the smug smile, as he says, “Fill ‘er up, please.” Unknown

It’s not a scene breaker; that is accomplished by the soft core porn saxophone that immediately follows.  But that smug smile….sort of, yeah I’m James Bond, I know that’s cheesy, but what are you going to do about it?  And for better or worse, I think that’s kind of what defines Roger Moore in Octopusssy, sort of a Devil may care attitude, this is my last go-around, so what the Hell?

People love to bag on Bond in a clown suit.  Let us not forget just 20 minutes of movie time earlier, he was in a gorilla costume.  I’ll explain in a bit why the clown moment doesn’t bother me.  And yes, I know, it’s a circus train, sure there’s a gorilla suit nearby.  But it just seems more like Roger Moore saying, “It’s my last go-around, why not wear a gorilla suit?”

But the number one problem with James Bond in Octopussy is, quite simply, Roger Moore was in his mid 50s.  Octopus is closer to Bond in age, Magda not so much.  I get that Magda was just trying to retrieve the Faberge egg for Kamal, but it’s still hard to fathom her being interested in someone who is so much older.  And if you think that age difference is bad, just stay away from A View to a Kill.  Look, Moore being older doesn’t impact the action sequences.  He’s in great shape, and he looks rightfully exhausted when he escapes from the jungle hunt.  Same with when he’s running through the German forest from the knife thrower.  I’m venturing into What Worked territory, but when Bond is trying to reach the U.S. Air Force Base, he looks completely drained.  He looks like…well, what a mid 50s guy would, after running.  That all works.

But what doesn’t work is the descent to immaturity.  The irreverent one-liners, that’s part of the Bond shtick.  But the scene that really sticks with me is Bond in Q’s lab.  You know the drill; outrageous killing machines being tested and Bond with a groaner of a line, to jab at Q.  While Q is showing off a video camera, Bond trains it on the cleavage of a nearby desk worker wearing a low cut top.  I don’t mind Bond flirting with Miss Moneypenny’s new assistant, Penelope Smallbone.  If anything, that was a great touch by John Glen to show how everyone is getting older.  Miss Moneypenny is training her younger replacement.  And of course Bond is going to flirt.  But zooming in on the cleavage of some woman who is probably 30 years younger?  That scene hasn’t aged well at all.  If Bond did it in Live and Let Die, when Roger Moore was much younger, it still would seem cringe-worthy today.  But when you add the age difference between Moore and whoever played the secretary….its just gross.  I’m not saying Roger Moore was too old to play Bond in Octopussy; in many ways (Miss Moneypenny’s replacement, looking tired, Octopussy herself being older), the script and direction accounted for an older Bond.  But there were still too many moments where you just wanted to say, James, really….haven’t you grown up yet?  Which is basically what Q tells him.  Here’s the scene.

What Did Work:

Alright, let’s get to the Clown Suit.  Look, I get it, I really do.  James Bond is too tough to wear a clown suit.  Bond just wouldn’t do that.  Well, a couple things here.  First off, the movie prepares us for it.  The first scene after the credits is a clown running from pursuers in East Berlin.  We find out that was 009.  So it’s not like Bond is the only 00 to go clown.  Next, let’s re-trace the steps that led to Bond as a clown.  He’s stowed away on Octopussy’s circus train, aware that there is an atomic bomb hidden in the cannon.  He’s first in the gorilla costume, and then in the red shirt and black vest of the knife throwing act.  He’s been thrown from the train, killed the other knife thrower (“That’s for 009,” he brags, as he dispatches the assailant) and is trying desperately to get to the Air Force Base.  Time is ticking down on the bomb.  We see Bond, James Bond, on the side of the highway, hitch-hiking.  That’s right, the man who drove an Aston-Martin is hitch-hiking.  And when a car full of teen-agers fool him into thinking they’ll give him a lift, he flips them the bird!  Bond ends up walking into town, is shut out from using a public phone booth, and resorts to stealing a car.  From that, he crashes into the Base and changes into the clown outfit.  If your next question is how he puts on all the clown make-up…..well, just roll with it.

Look, Octopussy is no Daniel Craig film.  There’s a limit to how vulnerable James Bond will be.  But again, as this was going to be Roger Moore’s last film, I do think he was open to taking chances.  And one of them was making Bond seem human.  This is a 007 with a limit.  He is affected by Vijay’s death, much more noticeable than when any previous accomplice died.  He is desperate to try and stop the bomb; there’s no gadgets, no fancy ride.  Bond tries to hitchhike, steals a car, and dresses up as a clown.  There’s no Bond in a tux with a deadly shot; this is as humbling as it gets.  It’s a preview of the Bond who will be played in later films.  Here’s the entire clown scene.  Yes, I understand if you can’t handle Bond as a clown.   But this goes to my point of how, at this point in the role, Moore was okay with Bond not being invincible.  Not only is Bond a clown, he can’t even convince anyone that there really is a bomb about to go off.  It’s about as hopeless as a Roger Moore James Bond has ever been.  You might have to go all the way to Casino Royale for the next time Bond seemed so desperate.  Sure, I get it; James Bond as a clown who no one will believe is a long way from Bond in a casino, in a tux, drinking a martini, shaken not stirred.  If that’s the only way you want envision James Bond, then yes, the clown outfit just doesn’t work.  But if you’re open to Bond being shown with his defenses down, at his wit’s end, up against impossible odds….then the clown suit works.  And that’s why I put James Bond in a clown suit as what worked about Octopussy.

Overall thoughts

So, after all that, does Octopussy work in 2020?  Yes….with reservations.  All that made it enjoyable are still pretty much there.  The action scenes are still gripping, the setting is still fabulous, the characters are still memorable….its still a fun ride.  And it could be made today….with some necessary changes.

And that’s what I’ve been thinking about.  The last Bond film, SPECTRE, brought back the character of Blofeld, and even gave him a backstory.  The next to be released film, No Time to Die, is rumored on the internet to give us the character of Dr. No, from the very original film.  If Eon Productions is revisiting some previous Bond characters/ideas, another look at Octopussy would actually work really well.  Here’s why and how:

  1. The character of Octopussy and her operation.  Perhaps even make her a villain, or explore more of the moral ambiguity of what she does.  Octopussy never really went there.  There’s so much potential in the character of Octopussy and her operation.  Bond encountering a criminal operation in India, run by all beautiful women, also fronting legitimate business enterprises, and operate as a cult on a floating palace…there’s so much to be done there.  BUT….

This time around, Octopussy has to actually be Indian.  Or if you want to keep the tie to her father being a rogue British agent apprehended by Bond, make Octopussy’s mother Indian.  Just don’t make her all white.  If you want much of her minions to be white, fine.  You can keep the idea of women coming to Asia searching for something.  Octopussy can still be their guru.  But make her authentic to her setting, rather that someone playing Indian..

2.  Keep all the action, just remove the slapstick.  Let Bond swing on a jungle vine, just do so without a Tarzan yell.  Keep a Tuk Tuk chase, just take out the Indian stereotypes.  The action itself is great.

3.  In terms of villains, a new version of Octopussy would have to replace the Cold War setting.  So, something would have to take the place of General Orlov and Red Army ambitions.  But there’s definitely a place for Kamal Khan in re-imagined James Bonds.  A fabulously wealthy and silky smooth gentleman operator of international criminal enterprises….to me, a a reimagining of Kamal Khan would stretch multiple films, but would never be the arch enemy.  I see Kamal as someone Bond crosses paths again and again.  Each film has a villain with a global scheme…..but Kamal is always operating in the background as a connecting force.  Perhaps this modern Kamal doesn’t exactly hate Bond; they run parallel to each other, a Ying and a Yang.  Some films, Kamal might have a small part, others a bit larger.  Think of him sort as the opposite of M.  Or of Q.  Perhaps Kamal is selling weapons.  Or information.  Bond repeatedly encountering a villain who doesn’t have a scheme, but just operates a network that enables other baddies….that’s something that could really work.  And Kamal Khan is the type to pull it off.  And of course….if Kamal is Aghani, have him played by an Afghan actor.  No offense, Louis Jourdan!

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Look, there’s probably not any movie 40 years old that hasn’t had problems with aging.  The most egregious thing about Octopussy today is the cultural appropriation: white people playing at India.  And with Bond being British, it’s the idea of revisiting the Raj.  The white-centric of all the Indian scenes is troublesome.  But it’s a long list of scenes from Bond films that aren’t great today.  Sean Connery telling a girlfriend to run along because it’s Man Talk now in Goldfinger comes immediately to mind.  But for me, the question is, is there more to Octopussy than these problems?  Take the tropes out of the Tuk Tuk chase and it’s a great sequence.  The attempts to stop the bomb are great.  Kamal, Gobinda and Orlov are all great villains.  The plot is both fantastic and realistic.  Octopussy herself (yes, cultural appropriation) has such a different backstory for a Bond girl.  And related to that, it’s a Bond film where the women can stand on their own.  Team Octopussy taking out Team Kamal is terrific.  That in and of itself, is something remarkable for its time.  And it’s all filmed so well.  Octopusssy is not without its problems, but its still a Bond film I rank very high.  Flawed, yes…..but it works.  I put it right there with The Spy Who Loved Me for Roger Moore’s finest.   It’s a mess….Faberge eggs, a crime network of beautiful women in India, Cold War nuclear schemes, a Circus…..but somehow, between Roger Moore, John Glen, John Barry and Louis Jourdan it all just works.

And for those reasons, Octopussy will always be a Bond film I’ll periodically return to.  I can’t say the same for Moonraker, The Man with Golden Guy, or Live and Let Die.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, the soufflé can’t wait.  And I must learn how to play backgammon!

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